And So It Begins
In the first hours of the New Year, thoughts about it
How did you see in the New Year? As usual, I went to bed hours before the year ticked over, and awoke, minutes into the year, only to fall asleep again for a few hours.
But I’m awake now, and thinking.
New Year’s resolutions haven’t really been a thing with me, the past few years. Sure, last January, around two or three weeks into the month, I decided to use an app to motivate me to walk every day, and I’m still more or less doing 6000 steps a day, so that’s a win.
The other habits came gradually over the various months of the year. Deciding to get back into choir; practising and singing weekly with the choir; meditating once a week with a group meeting at the Cathedral; getting back into daily meditation; getting back into regular singing practising at home when needed; and so on.
So while I’m open to more regular practices if they seem timely and relevant, I’m not trying to decide today or this week what to change.
Or, more accurately, I already know one of the things I have found challenging but essential, and continue to incorporate it into my life a tiny bit at a time, against a fair amount of resistance and distraction.
Being present.
Present to myself. Listening to my body, letting the tension in my muscles go as it automatically tightens, looking after myself, speaking up for myself as needed.
Present to my loved ones. Listening properly when they speak. Listening without interrupting or waiting impatiently to speak (so challenging at times!). Listening with love as well as attention. Listening to love, not to fix.
Present to other people around. Paying attention to my surroundings instead of getting lost in my head or in my work. Noticing what is needed of me.
Present to Spirit, to God. I used to think I needed to listen more for what God is trying to say to me. Now I understand that what I mostly need is to relax more deeply into Presence because it is in that open and receptive space that anything I need to hear will become clear.
But often the message is, just Be Here. Deeply be present to everything the moment is now, without expectation or judgment.
Next Wednesday, a second Being With begins, Being With Yourself. And the following week our Dean and our Associate Priest will begin an online Being With part one again. I am very intrigued about both of these experiments in presence, though I won’t be participating in the online one. Probably other Being With groups will begin in other parishes in the Diocese as well, and that will be cool.
Among other helpful aspects, co-leading Being With grounds me weekly in the priority of Presence, along with the daily and weekly walking and meditation, the weekly choir singing and the practising at home, and the other wellness practices. I am extremely grateful for all of these, and for every person in my life who helps ground me.
Stay with me
Let's just breathe
And so it begins.